Be The Parent Please Book Review

Be the Parent Please is a fabulous book that helps parents be in control of the technology in their home.

(Note: I was given a copy of this book for review but my opinions are my own.)

First, let me share a little experience that I had. A young family (a father, mother, and two young sons) visited my husband and I. It was a lovely summer day. We were outside on our patio.

The kids ran screeching with delight for our swing set. My husband and I followed them. We pushed them — higher, higher!

As my husband and I enjoyed playing with these kids, I looked at their parents. They stood at the edge of our patio, cell phones clutched in their hands, deeply intent on their phones — oblivious to their children.

I have no idea what they were doing on their phones. But, I definitely knew what they were NOT doing. They weren’t playing with their kids. They were not ‘in the moment.’ They were not having a great bonding time with their children. I felt sad for them.

In Be The Parent, Please, Naomi Schaefer Riley urges parents to take a hard look at their own personal lives, how they use technology, how it impacts them, and how it impacts their parenting habits.

In her book, Riley says that parents need to seriously evaluate how technology affects their family life and ask, “Is this really the the type of life that I want for my family?” and “What is the purpose of technology in our lives?”

And on the flip side of technology, Riley tells parents that they need to fundamentally decide how their children are going to interact with other family members, with friends, and the world around them.

Here are a few nuggets I gleaned from the book:

  • Youth of today are developing a level of narcissism unknown to previous generations.
  • A survey done by Kaplan Test Prep, 40 percent of college admissions officers report checking applicants’ social media before deciding whether or not to give them an acceptance letter.
  • Pornography is becoming a major source of sexual ‘information’ where boys develop their attitudes about sex and their beliefs that girls are ‘objects’ and there to give boys pleasure — and sadly girls are accepting that role.
  • Habitual players of violent video games may be at risk for not only developing aggressive, antisocial behavior but also for having a limited imagination and limited scholastic interests.
  • Youth have a difficult time focusing on a single thing or maintaining sustained thought outside of technology.
  • Corporate America spends billions each year on in-house literacy and colleges spend billions on remedial education!
  • Without adult supervision, teens do what’s easiest — taking selfies, being on Shapchat or Twitter. But these are not things that prepare them for adult life.
  • Parents choose not to parent in difficult moments by giving their kids a cell phone, iPad, or tablet to distract them.
  • Parents are trying to be friends with their kids instead of being the parents.

I want to say that I think EVERY parent needs to read this book. EVERY person who is contemplating having children needs to read this book. EVERY person that uses technology needs to read this book.

Parents need to take a long, hard look at how technology is impacting their kids and their relationship with others. Parents need to wake up to the fact that technology alters relationships. And, parents need to step up, be the adult, be the parent, and make conscientious choices about how to use technology!

Parents need to take the bull by the horns and step up and be a true parent! Parent intentionally — especially where technology is concerned!

6 thoughts on “Be The Parent Please Book Review

  • Two Chicks and a Mom/Donna

    Great post, Nina. Even before the advent of smartphones, I read once that parents needed to maybe not snap so many pictures with the camera; in doing so, they were missing out on the “actual” event that was going on. I guess technology keeps plugging along (which is good in a lot of ways) and parents need to figure out their kids need them to be “in the moment”. Thanks for sharing at Party in Your Pjs.

  • Nina Lewis Post author

    Karen, this can be so frustrating for grandparents . . . and heartbreaking, too! I hope that your granddaughter will recognize what she is doing and talk to you instead of taking selfies!

  • Nina Lewis Post author

    Kari, I wish you all the best in raising your daughter!! I think it is MUCH harder for parents of today than when I raised my kids!

    Merry Christmas!

  • Kari Wagner Hoban

    I need to read this! I just mentioned to my mom about my nine year old and how she comes home from school learning things that are way above being age appropriate and that when she is on break, she becomes a little kid again. It is so hard raising children in this time of staring at your smartphones but I am trying.

    Pinning this so I remember to look for this on Amazon!

  • Karen Eidson

    I have tried spending time with my teen granddaughter. The whole time she is in the car with me, with me trying to have a conversation with her, she is on her tablet, taking selfie after selfie, hundreds of them in an afternoon. I told my husband that is was so narcissistic and self centered. I think she won’t even miss me if I stop taking her on outings.

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