I recently finished reading The World is Flat:A Brief History of the Twenty-First Century by Thomas L. Friedman. Now, to know me is to know that I do not particularly like history. However, my reading tastes are maturing (finally . . . it’s only taken half a century!) and I totally enjoyed this book. In fact, that was about all I could talk about for a week!

There was one section in Friedman’s book that was geared toward parents. If you stick with me, I’ll point out how Friedman’s comments can apply to grandmothers, too.

Friedman states that parents need to practice tough love. Back in the 1980s (or whenever tough love was first made popular), tough love was meant more as a way for parents to deal with children who were out of control behaviorally, who were using drugs or alcohol, or who were in other similar situations. Parents would take tough stands against their children’s behavior in an effort to stop enabling their children and to help their children deal with their out of control behaviors.

However, Friedman’s tough love is slightly different — yet no less tough. He calls on parents to turn off the TV. To put away the Game Boys. Shut off the iPods. (And I might add, unplug the Wii games.)

“We are a society of me, me, me,” states Friedman. If children want something , they want it now. They don’t want to have to wait for it. Youth and adults alike ‘just want to have fun.’ Instant gratification. If something isn’t fun, kids don’t want to do it. (Nor do their parents.)

Parents feel more obligated to enroll their children in gymnastics, or join a soccer team, or take voice lessons, or participate in a local children’s theater group rather than stressing priorities in education and doing well in school. Parents feel that if children are doing okay in school and if their children are enjoying school then their kids are getting a good education.

Friedman states that American homes are devoid of books and printed material. Parents do not help their children recognize that hard work is associated with an education and that doing well in school is a top priority. Parents don’t enable (or should I say allow) their children to suffer some short-run pain (studying instead of playing) for longer gain. Parents just plain don’t have high expectations for their children’s success in this new millennium.

Now, these claims are fairly generalized. I’m sure that there are parents out there who don’t pamper their children with whatever their children want. Parents who make their kids work. Parents who make their kids study — and study hard and study hard subjects.

In other areas of his book, Friedman explains how technology is being outsourced to other countries. Those other countries can produce items cheaper than it can be made in the U.S. However, the edge that the U.S. has over these other countries is that Americans are innovative. They think creatively. They come up with new ideas for technology, new ideas of things to make, new ways for doing things. That’s Friedman’s take on things.

So what does all this have to do with grandmothers, you ask? Several things. First, you can help to provide books and printed reading materials in your grandchildren’s home. Like many of my readers have suggested, give books to your grandchildren. For birthdays. For Christmas. For Ground Hog’s Day. Make sure your grandchildren have good quality reading material in their homes! Provide your grandchildren with a wide variety of subject matter to read (so they won’t be such an intellectual pygmy like me when it comes to history or political science or geography . . .).

When your grandchildren visit you, read, read, read, with them. And, in case you missed my point, read whenever possible with your grandchildren!! Make sure that you make it fun and not a drudgery. If you made it feel like school, your grandchildren would feel resentful and then things would backfire on your good intentions. Have a huge dollop of love generously sprinkled with tons of fun while reading with your grandchildren. (You might want to ask them what other things they are reading, express an interest in it, and have them share their thoughts on their reading.)

Another suggestion is to give your grandchildren puzzles. Create a grandma kit that contains puzzles of several varieties to take when you visit your grandchildren. Give them sudoku books. And, when they come for a visit, put puzzles together with them. These activities help develop spatial intelligence. Maybe you could create a puzzle together with your grandchildren by gluing a picture on a piece of cardboard and then cutting it into random shapes.

Give your grandchildren logic problems to solve. Problems similar to the story math problems we had in elementary school. You know the kind — if a train leaves New York City traveling 55 miles per hour and a train leaves Chicago traveling 75 miles per hour . . . Bleah! BORING!!! However, if you made it more pertinent to their life today, they would have more ‘buy in.’ They wouldn’t roll their eyes at you and groan. Instead, ask them how many songs they could buy in iTunes if you gave them $15 for their birthday? Or how many songs could fit on a 4 gig iPod shuffle if the average file size was 5.1 MB?

The Kid’s Game Page has lots of strategy games for kids to play. Of the games that I played, I only won the Rush Hour game. (Is that because I have the blessing of ‘playing’ that game twice a day, five days a week as I drive home?? Naw, I just didn’t spend that much time playing the other games!)

Be a discriminating video/computer game player with your grandchildren. Does the game Doom improve critical thinking skills? Not hardly. Avoid games with violence, blood, and killing. Instead, play computer games with your grandchildren such as Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego, The Oregon Trail, SimCity, or SimCoaster.

If our edge over the third world countries is our ability to be innovative and creative, find ways to encourage your grandchildren to be creative and to think — but make it fun. You are not their school teacher. You are not their mother. You are their loving grandmother — who just wants to have stimulating fun with her grandchildren as you help them develop their creativity.

Keep On Thinkin’!
Digi-Gram

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