Darlene T. from Salem, Utah, wrote to me to share some of her ideas about being a grandmother. She said:

“One thing that I learned from observance is just to love the grandkids. Our job is not to discipline — just to love. That doesn’t mean that we can’t teach or set right examples, but we don’t have to make discipline the main focus. My mother tried to just discipline and some of my kids ended up with bad vibes. So just love them.

“One thing that I do is to have a “birthday dinner” for them at their birthday time. They can choose the entire menu, get to use a red plate, and get sung to. I do buy them a gift, but I don’t give it to them at their birthday dinner which I have on the Sunday before their birthday. Everyone is excited to sing and see what their menu is. Because of this year being a little different (note: Darlene fell while skiing and broke her hip), my one granddaughter did not get her birthday dinner. When she and her mom (my daughter) were helping me shower and get dressed when I got home from the hospital, she mentioned that she does not feel like she was 9 years old. It dawned on me that she has not had her “Oreo” cake that she requested and has not been sung to. Her birthday is still not complete.

“Another thing that I have tried to do but have not done every year is holding “Grandma’s Summer Camp.” At first, I let little ones in diapers come, but now with so many (we now have 28 grandchildren) I only invite those that are potty-trained and those who can swim. (Note: Darlene has a swimming pool at her home.) We do lots of fun things such as horseback riding, swimming, and participating in the Spanish Fork children’s parade, which means we have to make a float. One year my 5 year old grandson walked a llama in the parade. (Note: Darlene and her husband have an assortment of unusual animals and that was where her grandson had access to a llama!)

“I ‘baby-sit’ every Tuesday for my daughter that works that one day a week. I really look forward to it because all I really do is just pick up Justin from kindergarten at noon, and then we do errands. He gets in the car and says, “How many stops, Grandma?” I try to make them fun stops. He likes Costco, going to a candy store, and of course Carl’s Jr. Then I go to their home and help the older kids with homework especially the 2nd grader with spelling words. We just make a game of it and have a great time.

“But as I said earlier, the main thing is just to love and accept them. I wish I would have done that with my own kids- — just give undivided attention and make games of it. Maybe that is why grandmas are good.”

Ideas that I loved:

• Having a special red plate for the birthday grandchild to use for the birthday dinner
• Making a float and participating in a children’s parade
• Grandma’s summer camp
• Making errands fun when you have a grandchild accompanying you

Well, I’m off to buy a special red plate!
Digi-Gram

One of my friends is an English teacher. (Actually, I have MANY friends that are English teachers!!) But this particular one shared with me what she does when a grandchild has a birthday.

On their birthday, she takes them to the local bookstore. They browse through the age appropriate books and then (under her wise guidance and tutelage) she lets them select 5 books. After she purchases the books, they head out to a local eatery of the grandchild’s choice and have lunch. Just the two of them. What a great way to celebrate a birthday!

The other day I read that the week before Thanksgiving is National Children’s Book Week. What a great time to share this birthday idea and to encourage grandparents everywhere to find ways to instill a love of books and a love for reading with their grandchildren.

I read Walk Two Moons by Sharon Creech to our kids as we were driving home from a vacation. (It was the Newbery Medal winner in 1995.) We still had several pages left to read when we pulled into the garage. We scurried out of the car to the patio so that I could finish reading the book to the kids. When we were finished, we went back to the car and started unloading it.

Walk Two Moons is a story about thirteen-year-old Salamanca Tree Hiddle whose mother has disappeared. Sal sets across the United States with her Grams and Gramps in an effort to find her mother. She entertains her grandparents with stories of her friend, Phoebe, who sees “lunatics” around every corner. During this pilgrimage, everyone’s “story” is told — stories that are humorous and poignant.

This would be a great gift to give a pre-adolescent girl. It would be a great book to read to a granddaughter as she stayed overnight on a week-end. It would be a great book to discuss with a granddaughter. It’s just plain down and out a great book! (You know, my sons enjoyed the book just as much as my daughter did. So don’t hesitate to share it with boys, too.)

If you have any ideas about celebrating a grandchild’s birthday, please feel free to share it here!

Digi-Gram